Right before circuit breaker, I started my internship at a fashion retail e-commerce. It was an internship I was extremely excited for. I got to experience about 2 months of office life and I absolutely loved it, so the thought of being stuck at home working really sucks. All the company events, sample sales, weekly office life was taken away from me in an instant and now internship has been reduced to “work”. I was looking forward to all these possible internship “perks”, so when my experience did not match what I ideally expected, I felt regretful.
I would love to say, “I enjoyed my time at home with my family”, but that is not the case. The first few weeks at home was chaotic. Friction happened every other hour and if I could describe it… it felt suffocating. Staying home during this season highlighted the kind of relationship I had with my family. It showed me how, over the past few years, I’ve been out so much that I’d lost a lot of precious moments with them. And because of that I am distant from them. While the initial friction irked me, I have learnt to enjoy moments with them. Family time became a part of the norm again for me. Having meals so frequently with my family, playing a game of mahjong into the wee hours of the morning, a simple birthday affair with them or even trying bakes with my family felt different, but in a good way. It has been so long since I had such moments with them, and I think this season brought that to life again.
Moments with my brother have become more frequent too. Deciding what to eat every day and ordering food in are conversation starters that lead to good conversations. It made me realise that maybe I like staying out because I thought staying home too much would cause friction. Yet during this season I found out that it may not be all true.
I do still miss my human interactions. I miss my friends, travelling, being in church and eating mookata/steamboat. I was real sad when a friend of mine came over to my place to deliver me food and I could not hug her. I can’t wait to be out with them again. Zoom calls, online games and Netflix party shall suffice for now.